The Primevals (1994 / 2023) - Movie Review
Full Moon Pictures always made the best marketing materials.
What if I told you that a modern film used stop motion animation reminiscent of the work of Ray Harryhausen?
What if I told you the film revolves around the idea of Hollow Earth and lizard people?
Perfect timing right?
What if I told you this movie was a dud when it was originally shot in 1994, but somehow is a fun, if not charming watch today?
Don’t get me wrong, it’s bad.
Let’s discuss.
The Primevals is a 2023 (technically) fantasy adventure film brought to us by the late, great writer/director David Allen and writer / visual effects legend Randall William Cook. You probably won’t recognize either of their names, but both have had a massive impact on cinema. Allen is a beloved legend of B-cinema, and was a proud member of the horror community. He was one of the last great movie puppeteers, and it’s thanks to him we have the eerie movements of the Knife and the gang from the Puppet Master franchise and the mini-dinosaurs in the Prehysteria! series.
Unfortunately, cancer took David Allen from us far too soon, and far before the film could be completed. As Full Moon Pictures went from boom to bust in the late 90s to 2000’s due to overspending and poor management, along with the crash of the once booming direct to video market. Now, many of their projects did get sold and produced following the company’s downfall, but this one was left in Limbo. This movie would have been a hard sell, even in the DTV era. It’s a hard one to sum up, but here we go:
The film focuses on a young, pure of heart anthropologist Matt Connor, as he returns to his college campus at the exact time an inexplicable exhibit is being revealed, a preserved Sasquatch. An exhibit that not only confirms his ideas, for which he received nothing but scorn or ridicule, but also puts forward new questions. He reunites with his mentor Dr. Claire Collier, and together they assemble an off the books expedition to hunt down and capture a live specimen for study. They pick up their team members on the way including a gun for hire and a monster hunter from the Himalayas and the group travels to through the icy tundra expecting a straight forward hunt, but what they find is anything but. Will they survive the otherworldly adventure, defeat the lizard people, and save the Sasquatch, or will their bones rest in the core of the earth alongside their ancestors. Find out tonight’s feature, The Primevals.
This is an experience, not a good movie.
This isn’t a movie you need to play close attention to. This is an experience to behold, but it isn’t even close to being a good movie. It’s almost so bad it’s good, but misses by inches.
Between the Giallo-esque dubbing and terrible script, I didn’t take this one too seriously, but by God the actors did. The lead is played by the omnipresent hero of direct to VHS and late night cable T.V., Richard Joseph Paul. He takes every role dead serious, and has the perfect delivery for heroic character. His performance here is solid, but nowhere close to his best work. Which is 1994’s Oblivion, obviously.
Alongside Paul is a cast of incredible character actors including film legends Juliet Mills and Leon Russom. Who both bring their incredible talents to the table. They take cardboard cut-out characters and make them feel unique and interesting—even if they have barely anything to do on screen.
The special effects aren’t for everyone.
If you grew up with the films of Ray Harryhausen, you’ll probably have more than a little nostalgia for this type of stop motion animation. While not as a smooth as Harryhausen’s incredible work in 1973 classic, The Golden Voyage of Sinbad, it’s still fairly impressive. The scale of the climactic colosseum battle is incredible. If only the designs of the lizard / snake people were better, it really could have been mind-blowing.
The musical score is fantastic, as all Richard Band scores are. Without Richard, the machine that was Full Moon Pictures would have never reached the heights it did. Band was beyond in demand as a composer and rewatching old Full Moon movies illustrates why. No matter how bad a movie, the score would be solid.
This is a great movie to watch with your kids on a lazy Saturday morning.
This is a movie that can be put on in the background during a game night, or cleaning binge. It’s a fun throwback to a simpler time, when anyone could write a movie and make it real, with or without a budget.
Check this one out next time you can’t decide on something to watch, or if you just need background noise while you work on something else. You never know, you might like it.
As of this writing, this film is streaming on Amazon Prime.
